At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
