Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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