So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
