just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
