Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake

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  (704): Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake http://tfl.nu/8hsp
  Replies (8) Good night (542) Bad night (733) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance

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  (816): In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance http://tfl.nu/nm0w
  Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (415) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.

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  (858): I've rolled joints bigger than that penis. http://tfl.nu/pgx0
  Replies (29) Good night (706) Bad night (4489) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  how many servings is brandon's dick?

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  (203): nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body (508): how many servings is brandon's dick? http://tfl.nu/n1yr
  Replies (57) Good night (5113) Bad night (635)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs

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  (615): New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs http://tfl.nu/ycoz
  Replies (29) Good night (6246) Bad night (554) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.

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  (502): I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party. http://tfl.nu/23sk
  Replies (17) Good night (1021) Bad night (4710) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.

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  (903): The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover. http://tfl.nu/9bmt
  Replies (34) Good night (4213) Bad night (889) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.

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  (509): We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade. http://tfl.nu/xjtk
  Replies (6) Good night (4317) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you

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  (330): I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you http://tfl.nu/tpxb
  Replies (11) Good night (1813) Bad night (1087) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.

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  (781): Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in. http://tfl.nu/jeg6
  Replies (2) Good night (1617) Bad night (614)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.

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  (843): Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing. http://tfl.nu/zggy
  Replies (5) Good night (1922) Bad night (519) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.

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  (416): There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist. http://tfl.nu/x1kf
  Replies (2) Good night (422) Bad night (1028) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick

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  (602): Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick http://tfl.nu/rl3u
  Replies (4) Good night (327) Bad night (1248) Order T-Shirt
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  (351): View more from Massachusetts

  I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.

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  (351): I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh. http://tfl.nu/v1ee
  Replies (1) Good night (839) Bad night (299) Order T-Shirt
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  (626): View more from California

  I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.

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  (626): I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger. http://tfl.nu/jsvx
  Replies (2) Good night (250) Bad night (373) Order T-Shirt

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