how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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