Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
