went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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