Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
