what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
