Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.