i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just want nice things and good sex
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
