YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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