It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
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I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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