check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize