one might say we're banned from that church
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
