Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
