I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
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