Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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