I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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