At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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