That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize