Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
