i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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