Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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