Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
