D3 body, D1 cock
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
