i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize