I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I smell like Dick and happiness
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize