you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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