Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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