my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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