My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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