Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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