I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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