I'm sorry my penis didn't work
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Just high enough for therapy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize