yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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