i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
