doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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