shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Randomize
