idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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