Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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