We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
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as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
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I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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