ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
tonight lets celebrate not being married
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
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