fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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