i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
