youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
