Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Dear god my vagina.
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