It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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