Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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